What is a man's greatest confidence?

Anyone who has experienced the ups and downs of life will not hang their confidence on mutable things like wealth, looks, health, self-esteem, or skills.

Compared to talent, how does the short-lived genius Wang Bo, who wrote the "Preface to the Pavilion of Prince Teng," measure up? A single poem angered the emperor, leading to a life of wandering, and he drowned in the sea at 28.

Compared to charm, how does Liu Yong, who wrote "Talented poets and lyricists are naturally the white-robed officials," compare? Repeated failures in exams, early loss of his beloved wife, dying lonely and destitute, with rumors that the money for his burial was gathered by prostitutes.

Compared to handsome and wealthy, how does the second-generation rich Li Bai compare? A rare ambition to reach the heights, but in old age, impoverished and destitute, he drowned himself in a lake.

Go and look at those remarkable figures—who has gone through life smoothly? It’s either hardship in the first half or in the second half. When they rose early in life, they seemed chosen by heaven; but did anyone truly get what they wished for from such extraordinary talent? Their suffering and helplessness are just a sentence in history books. You naturally cannot empathize fully, but do they not live? On the contrary, their masterpieces all stem from profound enlightenment during times of suffering.

Borrowing a line from the "Preface to the Pavilion of Prince Teng":

“After the joy, comes sorrow; knowing the fullness and emptiness of life’s cycles.”

Everything has its lifecycle. Heaven and people both have their fortunes, which will change. People and things will change. What you possess now is only temporary; it can leave you at any moment. When these relied-upon things leave, you will feel the pain of being torn apart, leading to profound enlightenment.

So, what is your confidence?

The body will decay, wealth will dissipate, the brain will age, memories will fade, and even love will vanish with habit. After a hundred years, only a handful of earth remains.

Confidence comes from the openness to let everything leave you, the calm acceptance of all that happens, embracing the fleeting nature of life like a mayfly. It is about letting go of past regrets and future anxieties, living in the present, manifesting your true self. It’s knowing your limited life but not demeaning yourself, finally letting go of illusions and obsessions, and developing compassion for yourself and others.

Ultimately, confidence is the acceptance of everything that life brings, the manifestation of vitality in the present. Listening with your ears, seeing with your eyes, feeling every emotion, understanding your place in nature, finding joy in suffering.

This post is reprinted from Zhihu article.