My mom: "When will you bring your boyfriend home?"


Me: "No time."
My mom: "Your Aunt Chen's daughter, her boyfriend has changed three times."
Me: "I'd rather be single than settle."
My mom: "What you're lacking isn't good options, it's initiative. Are you not taking the initiative?"
Me: "I have no one chasing me."
She incredulously: "No one chasing you? Then last time you said someone brought you breakfast."
Me: "That was the delivery guy."
She paused for a moment: "Even delivery guys are fine, stable, paid daily."
Me: "He has a wife."
She looked at me: "Then next time you order takeout, just add an extra note saying you're single."
My dad was fixing the microwave in the kitchen and suddenly broke the knob.
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